Bitchicisms

Wednesday Sexy Time.

Sometimes, when you decide to take a break from the scene and just relax for a while, you get off on something that seems innocent but really isn't. There's a scene in Queer as Folk US where Brian Kinney and a hot intern pass by each other in the hallway and they make intense, smoldering eye contact. Brian tells Mikey afterward that he had sex with that intern in that one look. That's what flirting is. Not the sex part really. But a brain flexing its muscles and checking what another brain can do. It's mental...like sex for brains.

You feel caresses not given and read the other person's mind. There's some touching, some groping, some grabbing, but it's all done with the eyes. Not the words, not the hands, just the eyes.

I've seen how other people flirt with each other. There's a similarity in the way girls look at a guy they're flirting with. That kind of open eyed teasing thing most girls do. And some girls do it with slanted half closed lids, their heads bent down, staring at another guy sideways, then there lips curve slowly in a half smile.

Men respond to it. Especially if the girl is hot. But mostly they respond to it because the thought that a woman is currently imagining doing dirty things to them turns them on. Men like to think women can and will have sex with them whenever they wish. In their minds they are all in search of the elusive perfect fuck buddy. The girl who is hot, never wants relationships, doesn't talk too much, always ready and never gets her period at the wrong time. They also imagine a woman who wants to have sex with them all the time.

Flirting is best done simply and playfully, never too agessive. Agressive fliro eting makes me think that a guy thinks this is a hunt, and I am some deer the lion wants to eat alive. The eating is not my problem. The eating would be heavenly. But the whole testosterone fueled anger and rage behind it is not.

Playful light and cerebral is how flirting should be done. There are several different styles employed by most players I know. They all mostly have 1 thing in common, they make girls comfortable with the player, they make girls feel safe and at home. H and C have this down to a science. And yes, older dudes do play better than younger ones. They already have a fixed style, one that suites them.

The whole funny self deprecating humor of H serves him well in making women feel at home, though the dropping of pants highly depends on a girls tolerance for skin and bones. C's happy-go-lucky late night show host focus makes women want to hug him like he's her best friend yet also makes them want to see what it's like to wrap her legs around those dancing hips.

There are also guys who are funny and know how to talk to girls yet do not inspire much pant dropping. And also men who cannot for the life of them flirt yet end up getting laid almost everyday. B is nice and yes he knows how to treat girls yet he is too nice to be thought of as a fuck buddy. Women who play think of him as a guy who is too nice to play with, but I guess that depends on your liking for kimchi. O is funny and quite often rude and insensitive, yet his charm is an acquired taste that not everyone will welcome. V rarely talks, but when he talks, it is always intense and teaing and he is hot enough to get away with saying things like "I want to fuck you" on a regular basis. F is too nice, yet when he bends his head and smiles at me from underneath his long bangs with his eyes peeking playfully, it makes me wonder what it is like to fuck him, makes me want to try to fuck his brains out. Dear M who is beefy and has exquisite features, gets away with his funny and sweet nature as well as looking pretty while women fall all over him. A says so many things yet it is his eyes that made me want to wrap press my body against his.

Do I have a flirting style? One that works? Admittedly, I still do not dare approach a guy or girl out of the blue and try to generate a conversation or a connection out of thin air. In clubs I dance, if someone talks to me and I like how they appear to be, I respond. If not I try to smile as politely as I can and shoo them away.

I had some fun groping with O Wednesday. Despite everything it was still clean harmless fun. I do not take these little things seriously. Like I keep explaining to concerned friends, flirting with O is a natural consequence of being 2 horny people who are friends.

Sometimes I think I like the flirting more than the post sex talk. Flirting is better than foreplay. The verbal sparring pales in comparison to the body language. The way a man holds his body against a woman he wants to bed. The way women tilt their heads and cross their legs. Hands straying. Eyes maintaining contact.

See when I flirt with someone, in my mind, I've already fucked them. And it is the chemistry I see with my mind's eye that makes me decide whether to go ahead or stand down.

Having guys check out my ass makes me wet too. Yes, this self imposed hiatus is working out just fine. Gotta fine tune the engines for now.