Bitchicisms

I recently told some dude trying to figure out how to dump a girl in the nicest way possible that he can always get out of it and be excused (in the long run) by using the emotions excuse. The explanation I gave him was that women responded to emotions, not logic.

Now, did I believe this? Yes. I am a woman after all. So I kinda know how these things work. Of course it is bad to generalize, but I do totally believe what I'm saying and it makes sense.

Women right now are told that they can do anything they set their minds too. And that is generally true. It came about from the women's liberation in the 80's. Now the field is supposed to be level. Everyone is equal. If you want it bad enough and work hard for it, you can get it.

The problem is that women tend to apply the same instinct when it comes to men. Not all women though, but in general. The things taught to us, that if we work hard enough, anything will work, doesn't apply to relationships or to men. Because men aren't really goals. They are, at best, thinking human beings with minds of their own. At worst, they're really just like dogs whose greatest achievement is not peeing on the rug (or not getting caught peeing on the rug).

The thing is, we have great instincts. I've noticed that. I think life would be much easier for me if I always follow my initial gut feeling about anything. It often is true. Around 80% of the time. This especially holds true for men. Ever felt that something was wrong? That things weren't right? That maybe you should just give up? That it really is a bad idea? Hell I always respond to these thoughts with the perpetual: But it could be really fun and turn into a cool fucking story.

Now, I've noticed that with most women, the problem is that war between the instincts and the logic. Most women know if the men they are with are dogs but they want to believe that they are not. Even when most obvious signs point to 'yes, this is fucked up', some, maybe even most, will still trudge along and try. Because trying is the best they can do. And we're taught that anything will work if you try hard enough.

A lot of the times the push-pull of emotions vs. logic overwhelm us so much. This often results in the mood swings, the flakiness, the uncertainty, the whole girly thing of 'convince me and I will do it'.

So why did I tell that guy to play the emotion card when dumping? Because women understand that pull of emotions. No matter what logical explanation you say to a woman, the pull of an emotional explanation is stronger. We know what it's like to feel something really deeply and be swayed by it despite all rational facts to the contrary.

I told the guy: If you dump her, she will hate you right now. There is no way to do that without pain. But for the least amount of pain, tell her things just happened. Speak in large ambiguous terms. Refer to destiny or the stars or how you feel. Spin it nicely. Somewhere down the line she will remember you as that guy who was just not meant to be, not that fucker who started fucking someone else.